Many times I see couples struggling with their relationship and communication. Communication is the backbone to a healthy fruitful relationship of any kind. We get bogged down in the he said she said, he did she did and a bunch of finger pointing. This gets much worse when one of the people are self absorbed. The Bible talks about this in 2 Timothy 3:1-7
1But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. 2 People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive,disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, 4 treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God-- 5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people.
6 They are the kind who worm their way into homes and gain control over gullible women, who are loaded down with sins and are swayed by all kinds of evil desires, 7 always learning but never able to come to a knowledge of the truth.
“do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others”
Many people look at every situation as a way to better themselves. The Bible calls for us to do all things to bring honor and glory to God
1 Corinthians 10:31
So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.
Not to us, O Lord, not to us, but to your name give glory, for the sake of your steadfast love and your faithfulness!
When we get caught up in the trying to be selfish we bring the honor and glory to ourselves. The saddest part of this is most selfish people or the more accurate word, narcissist, they truly don't realize how selfish they are being. They are full of excuses, pointing fingers at others and pushing any negativity to those around them while seeking the attention they desire through any means necessary. You can quickly spot these folks in any group or gathering or even online. Their actions always draw your attention to them. They have to have the spotlight, use terms of ownership on everything (my, mine, I), typically over talk people, try to be the "life of the party". These people I truly hurt for. God called us to be Christlike. Did Christ do any of these things in His ministry on earth? No, He humbled Himself and carried our sins to the cross. He could have stole the spotlight and called down an army of angels to save Him, but He didn't. This is the example we should be following.
Now are there times to step out in the spotlight, yes, but only as a servant of God. Giving Him all honor and glory, keeping all worship to Him. This is a tightrope for those with self indulging behaviors. Ill advised, honestly. If you are looking at what this can do for you, then you are in the relationship for all the wrong reasons. Stick to what the scripture says, give it to God and if that is where He needs you he will open the doors. Matthew 6:33 says "But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these. things shall be added unto you." We have to trust the creator to show us what we were created for.
I dreamed of being a famous drag racer but I quickly learned it was toxic for me. I dumped every dime I had into cars and traveling to races, ruined friendships and relationships just so I could race. All of these things were so I could be selfish and do what I wanted to do. It was an addiction. The addiction of being who I wanted, doing what I wanted, when I wanted with no concern or care for others. I lied to myself for years telling myself how much I cared for those around me. Looking back I cared for only me!!!! It wasn't until I found that one friend that truly cared, that would be honest with me, that would hold me accountable for my actions and prayed with me and asked God to take this selfish nature away that my life began to change. I urge you to find that person, maybe several people who will stand in the gap in prayer, hold you accountable and see you through as God changes your life to better serve Him. The most important thing you look for in this person is a praying person who is in the Word. I am only one man but I am here if I can help you. I have several men on my heart as I write this that I pray God will open the door for me to talk to them about this.
As we go through life, we can use all the "church words" we want, post "Jesus this or that" on Facebook/ Social media but unless our heart is focused on Jesus we will not see the kingdom of heaven. Matthew 7:21 says "Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. You may be fooling the world and those around you, but God see's a man's heart. Truth be known, the Lord gives spiritual gifts and one of those is the gift of discernment and those who have that gift see through the smoke screen you are throwing.
Friends, I know this will stir up some people and I welcome any feedback. If you need to talk just hit the contact us button on this site or comment with a way for me to reach you and I will talk with you, pray with you and most importantly listen. I am not a perfect man, far from it, but I know the only perfect man who is my creator, God. I can introduce you to Him and pray with you often.
Let's close this time in prayer.
Father, I thank you for the person reading this blog right now. I thank you for the life you have given us to strive to be Christlike. I thank you for this ministry, Sons of The Savior and I pray every action we take and every word we speak is to only honor and glorify You. Father, the the person struggling with selfish behaviors, the narcissist, the attention seeker, I pray that you help change their focus to you. It is only by your Son, Jesus Christ, we may be saved and spend eternity with you. Lord, cleanse our mouths so we only speak Your truth, change our way of thinking to focus more on you and less on ourselves. Father, we are human, you give us minds to think, grow and dream but, Lord, how quickly do we turn these things into being self righteous. Forgive us for our sins and let us not lean on the fact that you forgive but put our trust and thoughts in you so that we strive not to sin against you. Lord we pray that you continue to place people in our lives that will help keep us on the narrow road to You. Lord, if I in anyway have caused someone to stumble and fall, to question You or pushed them away from You please right my wrong and help me mend those relationships. Lord, we thank you for protecting us as we ride and we thank you for the blessing of our Sons family and friends. Guide us and protect us until we meet again. In Jesus name we pray, Amen
Thank you spending a few minutes with me. Until next time God bless and Ride Safe